Deck Building Tips

The following was captured from a very old thread in recs.games.trading-cards.misc. I don't know if any of these email addresses are still valid or if any of the people herein still play the game.

Subject: [GD] Basic Deck Ratios?
From: savage@nntp.best.com (John and Denise Castellucci)
Date: 1996/11/26

I am a beginner to Guardians, and I was wondering if anyone could clue me into basic deck ratios?

How many total cards? Shields? Terrain? Spells? Critterz? Others?


Subject: Re: [GD] Basic Deck Ratios?
From: darkiczel@aol.com
Date: 1996/11/27

savage
Here's my generic recipe for a deck
- 2 shields
- 2 standard bearer's
- 8 terrains
- 1 Guardian
- 2 15.5 ounce cans fancy red kidney beans, drained
- 3 strongholds
- 3 dispel magics
- 4 medium/large onions(divided use)
- Almost always 1 or 2 curse fo the Betrayed's
- 15 maximum total magic item's and spells(15 if very high, depends on the deck)
- Champs, if you got enough magic items
- Creatures to fill up the rest to get around 60-65 cards
- 3 lbs. of ground meat
make 11 pints
- Darkiczel



Subject: Re: [GD] Basic Deck Ratios?
From: chrisjhyde@aol.com
Date: 1996/11/28

Do you really use that few shields? I generally use about 8 plus two standard bearers and a shield terrain card (if I have one that matches) in a deck of about 70-80 cards.

Chris



Subject: Re: [GD] Basic Deck Ratios?
From: crednose@aol.com
Date: 1996/11/28

I use at least 10% shields, 8-9% land, 50-60% creatures, and the rest spells and magic items. My decks usually have between 60 and 90 cards.

C Rednose



Subject: Re: [GD] Basic Deck Ratios?
From: darkiczel@aol.com
Date: 1996/11/28

Chris

Yes, yes. 6 shields + two standards. If I played with 70-80 cards I would use 3 + 2 and nine terrains, but a mid 60 card deck seems to work the best. I depends on the average vitality creatures you have. If you have a lot of small creatures you don't need as many shields, but then I play with about 70 cards, so I still play with 6+2. I actually have one deck that has 8 + 2 shields for about 62 cards, but that's because I have a lot of large vitaliity creautures in there

- DarkIczel



Subject: Re: [GD] Basic Deck Ratios?
From: darkiczel@aol.com
Date: 1996/11/29

Lawyers

How far exactly is a 3 from a 7 on the keyboard? These typoes are becoming quite pitiful.

- DarkIczel



Subject: Re: [GD] Basic Deck Ratios?
From: rk1066@aol.com
Date: 1996/12/01

I don't know if starter decks are optimized for play(I give the creators credit for some thought on this matter) but:

9 shields/56 playing cards = 16% shields(2 sig figs)
7 terrain/56 playing cards = 13%(12.5 rounded)

You can also estimate the shields needed by calculating the total deck vitality divided by 30. I have done this recently and it seems to work pretty well.

I stress shield numbers because you can't do anything in the normal game without them. Yet, too many shields may mean you sacrifice elsewhere.



Subject: Re: [GD] Basic Deck Ratios?
From: Paul Steiner
Date: 1996/12/01

darkiczel@aol.com wrote:
(See above.)

Serves up to 4. Serve cold. Flavor with salt and pepper. Also after making the deck add 5 more normal shields.

Paul

The sharpest blade does not win the duel but neither can you be victorious with mere conviction in your hands.

Homebrew Card: Pandora's Stones

Your Random Homebrew Guardians Card

Pandora's Stones:

Hand Magic Item, 30 Give yourself 1, 2, 3 or 4 power stones. Give your opponent twice as many.

Dumb Card Combos

Dumb Combos

These are the opposite of Trifectas.
These are things that only an Idiot would love.

Every now and then something stupid happens. Like the time you played the Rye Beaner as a command card before checking how many of your creatures would be affected. Then there are combinations of cards that are truly outrageous that only an Idiot could possibly try . . . .

1. War and Crash: Take another turn then pass it. Interesting to note that in Guardians the opposite of War isn't Peace.
   
   
2. Peace and Hands of Chronos: There might be a good reason to try this, but for three power stones, it better be a good reason.
   
   
3. Head of Gudea on top of your opponent's Harkin: If you're this stupid, you deserve to be pounded.
   

Do you have a Dumb Combo of your own (or even just a Really Dumb Move that you might have made)?
Tell everyone about it here.

Luring New Players to Guardians

(undated, original webpage last updated April '98)

I'm trying to make a list of cards that you have to have in a game when you and your opponent are primarily trying to lure other people into the game (to increase your pool of opponents, naturally).

Now the artwork will grab them, but first they have to be close enough to see it. So you have to lure them over with your babble and chatter. This means that the decks should be spiked with cards with either cool names, unusual names, or something that will just naturally attract attention.

I tried to stick to the main set so far, but anything's fair game.

1. "I give your Devil Dog a keg of beer to make him go away!"

First thing, you need Beer and Babe cards, and you both need to stack creatures bribeable by both of these. Gold doesn't attract as much attention, in my opinion.

2. Super Models

"My Supermodel steps in and lures your Knight to his death."
("Knight" sounds better than "Captain".)

3. Gunner/Master Gunner or any Pirate

I had to add this. A couple of friends of mine weren't really interested until I mentioned "pirates". Suddenly, I had their attention. For this reason, use the word "pirate" when attacking instead of the actual card name. And do the voice, too:

"Avast ye! Me pirate fires broadside at your Earth Elemental for 4 points of damage."

4. Giant Penguin

In your best British falsetto: "What's on top of the telly? Why, it looks like a penguin."

5. Floyd, the Flying Pig

Just a silly name. Prompt your opponent to say something like, "When pigs fly!" right before you play him.

6. Cow.

Just the very idea of a Methane attack and gassing the opposition is silly in itself. Unfortunately, the card is otherwise weak.

7. Babe Hound and Pig Dog

The names are funny. And if your playing with lots of Babes and Babes-bribable creatures, they come in handy.

8. Vampire

"My Vampire bites and sucks off two power stones."

If you play it up big enough, you'll get someone to glance at the card long enough to enjoy the artwork. If they're already standing close enough to see the card (and they're male) they'll start snickering at the words "sucks off".

9. Dinosaurs

Doesn't matter the name or that they're really "Saurians". Just roar and call them big dinosaurs and little dinosaurs.

10. Shadow Panty Raid

"I bring out the Babes."
"Well, I'm staging a panty raid and taking those babes away from you."

Ditto for the Shadow Beer Heist, if you're playing with a lot of Beer although you might call it a "Beer Run" or whatever expression you use.

Okay, that's my list, so far. What would you add (or subtract)?

Random Silliness: Playing Without Starter Decks

This was originally posted on usenet (rec.games.trading-cards.misc) when it was easier to find booster cards than starter decks, and, therefore harder to get new players into the game.

The Top Five Ways to Play Guardians
if You Can't Find Any Starters!

C. J. Burke

1. Use the "All Swamps are Shields" rule and put your forces behind the banner of "Parkinson's Murk".
   
   
2. Use Leftover Walls of Wood from Magic for your strongholds -- with a Wall of Stone in the center, providing 0/3, 0/8, 0/3 protection.
   
   
3. New Guardian: El Rey de los Corazones -- The King of Hearts. And remember, they don't call him "The Suicide King" for nothing.
   
   
4. Forget the rulebook -- just play Poker: "My four Slag Beasts beats your Mortal straight."
   
   
5. Turn Phases/Combat Summary Card?? Oh, please! Go out and buy a *real* coaster.

Christopher J. Burke
5/30/97

New Class: Gargoyles

Gargoyles

I wanted to create my own class of creatures for Guardians, but I wanted something based on existing fantasy. I came upon the idea of Gargoyles: those old water spouts on the tops of buildings that came to symbolize the ultimate protectors. I came up with several cards in one batch that I liked.

I decided that to give them a class ability in the way that all Ogres are immune to channeling. This would help in making a deck concept for them. I settled on the line "Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells." I think that is a handy benefit that isn't totally unbalancing to gameplay. On the other hand, I haven't thought about whether or not Ice Storm targets a particular creature or your entire Combat Hand. This may sound a little picky, but there are dozens of rulings on issues like this in the Magic: the Gathering rules.

Here are the cards that I presented on the Guardians mailing list:

Granite Gargoyle:

Elemental, Vitality 12, OCB 3, Large, Flying, Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
Immune to Hand Magic Items. Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells.

Stone Gargoyle:

Elemental, Vitality 9, OCB 2, Large, Flying, Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
+3 in Dry Heaps. Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells.

Ice Gargoyle:

Elemental, Vitality 8, OCB 2, Large, Flying, Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
Immune to Undead. Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells.

Snow Gargoyle:

Elemental, Vitality 8, OCB 1, Large, Flying, Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
+3 in Mountains. Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells.

Iron Gargoyle:

Elemental, Vitality 10, OCB 3, Large, Flying, Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
Immune to fire. Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells.

Guardian Gargoyle:

Elemental, Vitality 6, OCB 0, Large, Flying, Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
5 pt ranged attack, only usable if primary attacker is a Mortal. Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells.

Avenging Gargoyle:

Elemental, Vitality 7, OCB 1, Large, Flying, Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
-3 as primary attacker, +3 as a secondary attacker. Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells.

Argyle Gargoyle:

Elemental, Vitality 5, OCB 0, Large, Flying, Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
Destroys Golfer, Gopher and Caddy. Gargoyles cannot be the target of Spells.

Vampire Gargoyle:

External, Vitality 8, OCB 1, Large, Flying, Undead/Gargoyle, CMP 0, green bar.
If Vampire beats an opponent who has accepted channeling in this combat, your opponent loses 1 Power Stone. This Gargoyle CAN be the target of Spells.

Note that in the Seven Seas fan expansion set, there is a card called Gargoyle Rendevous. If isn't one of my cards. I don't know if it was inspired by my cards. It doesn't appear to be based on the ones above.

New Class: Dwarves

Dwarves

Back in 1998, I mentioned that I'd like to see some of the prime fantasy races that were missing from Guardians. In a message that dates back to at least 1999, I asked what creature class would you like to see added. My first response was Dwarves. Here was my rationale:

"From a fantasy perspective: there are no Dwarves. Elves are
represented by "fairies", though for some reason, Pixies and
Leprechauns aren't included as "fairies". But there are no
Dwarves. And I'd rather see fantasy-inspired (though not
necessarily Tolkien) dwarves than cutesy Disney ripoffs."

Here are all the cards that Dwarf cards that I have mentioned on the list. The only card that isn't here is Dwarven Mining Companies, because I never actually created it. It was supposed to be a land where you couldn't bribe by Gold. (Other possible titles for that land were Lost Cities of Gold or Treasure Island.) I decided not to include it now, mainly because the Seven Seas fan expansion has included a similar terrain card.

On the other hand, the Seven Seas also includes a card that is essentially the same thing as the Dwarven Tunneling Machine with a different name. (Naturally, they couldn't have used my card if the didn't include some Dwarves. And that doesn't mean that they took my card and changed it. Thierry had a similar idea and used it.)

As I did with Gargoyles, I gave Dwarves a class attribute. In this case, it was "Immune to Giants". Why? First, Dwarves would get really squished by Giants. Second, there is some fantasy literature to suggest that they might be. Both classes usually occupy mountain dwellings although not necessarily peacefully. Giants are generally above, and Dwarves below.

Here are my Dwarf cards:

Dwarven Fighter

Mortal, Vitality 5, OCB 2, Small, Beer, Dwarf,
CMP 0, red bar.
+3 in Mountains. Immune to Giants.

Dwarven Weaponsmith

Mortal, Vitality 4, OCB 1, Small, Beer, Dwarf,
CMP 0, red bar.
+1 Vitality to all your Dwarves while Weaponsmith is in play. Immune to Giants.

Dwarven Tunneling Machine

Creature Magic Item, Up 5
An all-Dwarves shield may move past a Mountains terrain that they wouldn't be able to bypass normally. All other movement restrictions apply. Cannot be used on Stronghold spaces.

Dwarven Hammer Thrower

Mortal, Vitality 4/6, OCB 1, Small, Beer, Dwarf, CMP 0, red bar. 4-point ranged attack. Immune to Giants.

Dwarven Mining Operation

Hand Magic Item, Up 13
Play during the Terrain Settlement Phase. If an all Dwarf shield turned in place on a Mountain and did not move, fight or reinforce this turn, gain two power stones.

Dwarven Armorer

Mortal, Vitality 3, OCB 1, Small, Beer, Dwarf, CMP 0, red bar.
C: You may spend 1 stone or discard one Magic Item to increase any Dwarf's Vitalty by 4.

Dwarven Lord

Mortal, Vitality 8, OCB 3, Small, Babes, Dwarf, CMP 0, red bar.
All of your Dwarves gain +3 Vitality for the rest of combat. Immune to Giants.

Dwarven Nomad

Mortal, Vitality 4, OCB 3, Small, Beer, Dwarf, CMP 0, red bar.
Immune to fear, except in the Woods. Immune to Giants.

The Table of Elements, Part 2

The Table of Elements

Part Two

Continuing

Overlords:

All Overlords are Large Beer drinkers.

• Rey, Overlord of Trees, Vitality 4, OCB 2
  (C):For the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be the Woods. No ranged attacks.
  
• Gnorg,Overlord of Swamps, Vitality 6, OCB 1
  (C):For the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be Swamps.
  
• Ix, Overlord of the Waters, Vitality 5, OCB 1
  (C):For the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be Rivers & Lakes.
  
• Uras, Overlord of Mountains, Vitality 2, OCB 2, Channeling Receiver,
  (C):For the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be Mountains.
  
• Slor, Overlord of the Wastes, Vitality 5, OCB 2
  (C):For the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be the Dry Heaps.
  
• Baezhu, Overlord of Twisted Ways, Vitality 2, OCB 2
  (C):For the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be Spires.
  
• George, Overlord of the Jungle *, Vitality 1, OCB 0
  (C):For the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be the Jungle. Opponent's command card is dispelled. (Note G)
  
• Cranston, Overlord of Limbo *, Vitality 1, OCB 0
  (C):For the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be face-down terrain. (Note H)

Elemental Lords:

All Elemental Lords are Medium-sized-sized Babe watchers

• Iron Lord, Vitality 10 OCB 1, 3 pt fear AOE. When played, +3 pts to the AOEfor each different type of Elemental Lord in play.
  
• Rock Lord, Vitality 12 OCB 1, 3 pt fear AOE. When played, +3 pts to the AOEfor each different type of Elemental Lord in play.
  
• Sand Lord, Vitality 11 OCB 3, +6 Vitality in Dry Heaps, -6 in Woods
  
• Lava Lord *, Vitality 9 OCB 1, +5 Vitality in Mountains, -5 in Rivers and Lakes (Note I)
  
• Mud Elemental Lord *, Vitality 13 OCB 3, +7 Vitality in Swamps, -7 in Spires.All your Mud Elementals are +2 Vitality while Mud Elemental Lord isin play. (Note J)

Related Creatures, Spells and Magic Items:

• Alchemist *, Mortal, Vitality 5/9, Medium-sized, Gold, Wizard, Channeling Receiver, CMP 5.Can channel to Elements only, even Elements that normally cannotreceive channelling. (Note K)
  
  
• Periodic Table *, Hand Magic Item, Up 12.(Picture: A big stone dining table with several of the above elementals sitting around it, eating and drinking).Play as a command card. Name any one Element. The creature named cannot fight and doesn't count for control of the space. (Both sides) (Note L)
  
  
• Chemistry Set *, Hand Magic Item, Up 19.Play as a command card. For one stone, you may play any Element on top of another Element already in a match-up. The combined 'Compound' has a Vitality and Off-Color Bonus equal to the sum of the two Elements, but can only accept channeling if the first creature could. The text box of the second Element is blank and the creature class becomes 'Compound'. If the combined creature loses the match-up, both creatures are beaten. (Note M)

Notes:

G - Catch 22! Jungles don't allow command cards, so can you have a command card that doesn't allow command cards??

H - Remember, face-down isn't terrainless. So your Tiger Baloos get a bonus, but your Silver Servers don't. Then again, no one else gets a bonus, either.

I - From an earlier sig file. You can't make these Elemental Lords too small, however, because that AOE can really get dangerous.

J - From an earlier sig file (Creature Class Critique #18). I sort of combined the Sand Lord ability with the Vampire Lord.

K - Alchemist bribable by Gold? Makes sense, doesn't it? Sure, he can make his (her?) own, but why bother when it's free. He needs at least CMP 5 because Elements are big creatures, but he also needs a higher stacking penalty than the Necromancer because of the "even though that normally ..." clause.

L - Bad puns are necessary. If I'm putting in all the pro-Element stuff, you need a bogey card.

M - I wasn't trying to create a really big ranged attack, that's why either both win or both lose (but they aren't destroyed, that's too much). The second text box is blanked to prevent sneaky tricks that I haven't thought of yet. And the wordy change in creature class is so you can't do it twice.

The Table of Elements, Part 1

The Table of Elements

Part One

First of all, there is some confusion in the game between "Elements" and "Elementals". This is due to the fact that the entire category of creatures with brown borders are called "Elementals". However, there is also a class of creatures called "Element", which includes creatures that are the embodiment of the natural (and some unnatural or supernatural) elements around us. These creatures have names like Greater Air Elemental.

Anytime the game refers to "Elementals", they are almost always referring to every brown-bordered creature in the game. When they only want to refer to those creatures with "Elemental" in the creatures' names, they are refering to the class called "Element".

It really isn't as confusing as it sounds.

With that out of the way, I would like to present a compilation of all the Elements in Guardians, including some that don't exist in the game. (I have marked those with asterisks.)

The "real" cards from the game are included so that you can see which gaps I have filled in. All Elements are Elementals (naturally). Unless I have mentioned otherwise, Elements have no off-color bonuses nor channeling ability nor bribery icons. Some Notes are at the bottom of the page.

Air, Earth, Fire and Water:

• Earth Elemental, Vitality 18, OCB 9 Large, +2 in the Dry Heaps.
  
• Fire Elemental, Vitality 14, Medium-sized, Flying, +2 in the Woods and 4-pt fire AOE.
  
• Greater Air Elemental, Vitality 16 Large, Flying, +6 vs flying creatures. (Note A)
  
• Water Elemental *, Vitality 12, OCB 6, Large, +4 in Rivers & Lakes. (Note B)

Air+Water, Water+Earth, Water+Earth (again), Earth+Fire, Fire +Air

• Vapor Elemental, Vitality 11 Large, Flying, Channeling Receiver. When played in a match-up, opponent must discard any Items in Combat hand.
  
• Mud Elemental, Vitality 8, OCB 2 Medium-sized, +4 in Swamps.
  
• Ice Elemental, Vitality 15, OCB 6 Medium-sized, +4 in Mountains.
  
• Magma Elemental, Vitality 9, Large, 4 point ranged-attack.
  
• Smoke Elemental *, Vitality 13, OCB 0, Medium-sized, Flying, immune to Mortals. Smoke gets in their eyes. (Note C)

Light, Dark, Energy and Fear:

• Light Elemental, Vitality 13, OCB 2 Large, Flying, Channeling Receiver,Destroys Darkness Elemental.
  
• Darkness Elemental, Vitality 13, OCB 3 Large,
  (C):Opponent must revealhis Combat Hand. You may choose to retreat before melee,but discard the Darkness Elemental to do so.
  
• Shadow Elemental *, Vitality 13, OCB 4, Large. +2 in Woods and Swamps. (Note D)
  
• Greater Energy Elemental, Vitality 12 Large Flying, Unlimited Channeling Receiver! CMP 2.
  
• Lesser Energy Elemental *, Vitality 5, OCB 0 Medium-sized Flying. Can receive up to 10 points of channeling. (Note E)
  
• Psychic Elemental *, Vitality 13, OCB 0 Medium-sized. 5 pt fear AOE that only affects Mortals. Fear-based attack.
  
• Fear Elemental *, Vitality 6, OCB 0 Medium-sized.
  (C):All primary attackers are +3 vitality vs. creatures affected by fear.

Miscellaneous:

• Vensuni Inferno Swarm, Vitality 6 (stacks as 14), OCB 4, Command: 11-pt AOE fire attack, discard entire combat hand
  
• Beer Elemental *, Vitality 6, OCB 3, Medium-sized. +10 versus Beer-bribable creatures. (Note F)

End of Part 1

Notes:

A - I didn't include a regular Air Elemental (as opposed to a "Greater" one) although I thought about it. Mostly because the Bantam Drake is already a smaller creature with a similar ability.

B - I'm curious what the actual stats would have been. When FPG closed shop, the next expansion was supposed to be "Seven Seas" and the theme was supposed to be "wet things" (according to Dave).

C - There was no Fire/Air Elemental and Smoke was a natural, except that there already is a Smoke Spirit. Since there's an Ice Spirit and Ice Elemental, it didn't bother me to make a duplicate here, either. Of course, if someone has a better name, I'll be happy to hear it. And I naturally needed a different ability. I toyed with the silly notion of something like "if in play and unbeaten, your Elementals are immune to Mortals", but I thought that was too much smoke.

D - I was not as happy with this one. "Shadow" is a great fantasy "element". But I couldn't think of a good, non-useless, not-overly-powered ability. I also couldn't decide what terrain had the most shadows. Woods can be dense, but Swamps are always depicted as dark and dreary. Jungles make me think "hot and sweaty" even though the jungles used to be referred to as "darkest Africa" and such.

E - Hey, why not? I kept the vitality low, so it wouldn't be a replacement for the Greater Energy.

F - At first, I thought about making him a destroyer, but I thought that might be a little much, so I make him an Elemental Giant Babe instead.

Outsmarting Myself!!

Now that I finished the Trifectas, I was looking for something else to post, preferably something that I still had the original HTML files for. (The Creature Class Critique files don't exist anymore -- I had to copy them from the Guardians Yahoo Group.)

I decided I was going to import my The Table of Elements.

Unfortunately, I created that file in Javascript, which I was experimenting with at the time, you know, to learn a new skill. I have NO IDEA how to import it other than to cut and paste the final page and then add all the formatting tags ... AGAIN.

sigh

Trifecta: Infinite Stones

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Infinite Stones

This one takes a little more than three cards, but three cards set it up. Submitted by KevinCron@aol.com.

Champs the Wonder Dog

Sacrificial Altar

Limited Big Time Rebate

Champs the Wonder Dog, for one stone, will go and retrieve any Item from your discard pile and Champs goes back into your hand as well. The Sacrificial Altar allows you to discard a card to gain a stone. Two sides of the same coin -- lose a stone to gain a card or lose a card to gain a stone. All you need is one Magic Item to start an endless cycle that doesn't get you anything.

The kicker: Limited Big Time Rebate. For every stone you spend this turn, you get half back at the end of the turn. That is, for every stone you spend on Champs, you get half back (rounded up, no less!).

Half of infinity is still infinity.

Other useful cards:

• Greater Energy Elemental: Can accept unlimited channeling -- and you have unlimited stones!
  
• Any other big channeler: You have the stones, use them.
  
• Guardian Angel: Any creature lost in battle is saved for one stone. It's a reusable Holy Grail. Of course, you have Champs to get back those Grails, anyway.
  
• Any standard bearer that requires spending stones: go for it.
  
• Do you see a pattern developing?

With Sikura as Guardian, your opponent will never be able to cast a Spell. Not Dispel Magic, not Summon Loghammer's Sapper, not Warwick's Banishment.

Forget the Terrain cards -- burn cards and stones for land.

Trifecta: How Do You Spell "Dispelled"?

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

How Do You Spell "Dispelled"?

Iron Force of Sethos

Spectre's Ward

Grazhue, Lover of Vice

Okay, so this is really a two-card combo that works best with one particular Guardian.

Grazhue's ability gives you a Power Stone every time you get bribed. Iron Force of Sethos prevents both players from spending stones on Spells or Items for the turn. Spectre's Ward increases the cost of all double-bordered cards by one stone.

IMPORTANT: Play Iron Force FIRST; otherwise, you'll be paying a stone to play it.

End result: Your opponent can't cast any Spells or Items this turn. And if he tries to bribe you, he loses a stone and you get one.

Other useful cards:

• Priest of Sethos: As a command card, no stones can be spent to channel either. It's pretty much a brute force type of thing. You can still use channelling creatures, but you better have some channel receivers ready -- you can't cast Power Lunch!

Trifecta: Zing! That Just Backfired

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Zing! That Just Backfired

Embyronic Witch

Bone Fright

Djinn

Okay, so the Embyonic Witch/Djinn combination is old, but it's necessary to keep your Bone Fright alive. You play the Bone Fright and Zowie! your opponent has lost all of his ranged-attacks as they are all forced to be attacked right now. The Djinn then keeps him alive and the Witch lets you kill your opponent's primary for good measure.

Against, a dedicated ranged-attack deck, you'll probably soak up most of his hand in the first battle! If you're opponent made the mistake of playing Handles O'Rourke, he loses ALL HIS POWER STONES! Not even Eye of Missile Mayhem will get those back, although Limited Big Time Rebate will get back half of them.

Also, the Djinn is perfect if your opponent plays the Manly Guy or some other card that steals your text box. Once you play the Djinn, no further modifications are allowed, so if you have more ranged attacks, they don't have to be played.


I scared my dedicated opponent from playing his ranged attack deck for quite a while. He was afraid to use Handles. Or his Traithes.

Trifecta: Zing! Went the Strings of my Bow

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Zing! Went the Strings of my Bow

Handles O'Rourke

Ploog's Ox Standard Bearer 19

Limited Big Time Rebate

Play Limited Big Time Rebate at the beginning of your turn. At the end of your turn, you get back half the stones you spent ROUNDED UP! Ploog's Ox Standard Bearer increased all your ranged attacks by +3 when your shield is on the attack. Handles O'Rourke is a command card that can shoot a 3-point ranged attack into any matchup for one power stone.

For one Power Stone, you can shoot a six-point ranged attack. And if you only shoot once, you get the stone back at the end of the turn. But why stop at one? Shoot five and get three stones back!

Other useful cards:

• Ploog's Chicken Standard Bearer 5:: you get the same bonus, only this time on defense.
  
• Make Juice: give yourself an extra arrow to shoot.
  
• Harkin, Spreader of the Wealth: start off with TEN stones, more than any other Guardian. You can't channel repeatedly, but you can still spend them over and over on the same guy!
  
• Bellerat, Third Called or any other Traithe: She's Vitality 4 with a 2-point ranged attack that's modified by the sum of the unmodified ranged attacks already played. One shot from Handles gives you six. And Bellaret for 2 + 3 (Handles) + 3 (Ploogs Ox) for 8 more points.
  

Warning! When using this setup, watch out for the following defensive combo! (published tomorrow!)

Trifecta: A Knight is a Horse, Nymphs, Too, of course!

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

A Knight is a Horse, Nymphs, Too, of course!

Mayor McGreed

Warwick's Conversion

Gold

With Warwick's Conversion you can make any creature you play into a Barnyard Animal and get that 7-point ranged attack. Your Captain just got whacked by a Vampire? Turn your Captain into a 17-point Sheep Dog. You got a Sloarch in the Dry Heaps? It's now a 28-point Chicken.

Cards that help the above combos tremendously:

• Nubian Slave Girl: destroy her and get your arrows back.
  
• Eye of Missile Mayhem: get back your Gold and even use it to bribe something.
  
• Shadow Bank Job: Use your opponent's Gold bribery card. Mayor McGreed is bribeable by Gold. Maybe your opponent will take a chance.
  
• Farmer Brown: Forget those silly Gold arrows. As long as you have all those Barnyard Animals anyway, push the Mayor out of City Hall and blow up those animals in the field.
  

Trifecta: A Little Pig Goes a Long Way

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

A Little Pig Goes a Long Way

Mayor McGreed

Floyd, the Flying Pig

Gold

Normally you can blow up Floyd to give +2 Vitality to all your creatures (and that's still an option if circumstances change). But another way to use Floyd is as a primary attacker after Mayor McGreed has been used as your command card. Floyd is just a tiny little 2 point creature, but with a Gold Bribery card as a ranged-attack, he can take attack as a 9. Where else are you going to find a Seven-Point Ranged Attack?

Actually, you find it Coming Real Soon.

Trifecta: Tinkerbell's Got an Attitude

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Tinkerbell's Got an Attitude

(and the Tooth Fairy will knock out a few!)

Soul Mirror

Randy Creek Regulars

any Fairy

You think you need a little extra power to kick some serious butt? Randy Creek Regulars allow all of your fairies to accept channeling up to the full amount that your Guardian can pump out.

Your Blackwaite Jumper is a piddling 1, have Rak Nam pump him up to a 10! Afraid you'll lose your Crook End Snooter? Finn can make him a 20 against Mortals!

And, naturally, if you need a couple of extra Fairies to get your Shield going . . . well, here's comes that really useful Soul Mirror again to make all your creatures into Fairies. Your opponent will just love you to pieces.

Other useful cards:

• Give your boys Real Attitude, drop a Channeling Flux before the real fun begins!
  

Trifecta: YOU COULDA BEEN A CONTENDER

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

YOU COULDA BEEN A CONTENDER

Chief Lector Priest of Sethos

Change your Undead's class to a different class.

Bruno Smashmouth

If your opponent's match-up creature is the same creature class as your creature, your opponent's must go back to the Creature Pen.

any Undead

Bruno's talking to you, and you're gonna listen up good. Unnerstan'? Bruno's sendin' back all 'em creatchas wit' the same class as one of his boys. Well, all his boys'r Undead, but that's jus' temporary, y'see. Dat's 'cause Bruno's boss, the Chief Lector Priest of Sethos, he's gonna change dem from Undead to the same ding youse got.

You pull a Knight, I pull a Knight. You pull a Fairy, I pull a stinkin' Fairy. Yours boys go on home and it's gonna cost you a lotta clamjacks.

Trifecta: FEAR NOT, MORTALS!

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

FEAR NOT, MORTALS!

Soul Mirror

Paladin

Brom's Dragon Standard Bearer

Change border color for 1 stone

Soul Mirror is such a useful card, changing the creature class of all your primaries to that of the first primary attacker. The Paladin has two great special abilities. First, he gives a Vitality bonus to all your Knights; second, he gives immunity to fear to Mortals. On top of that, the Paladin *IS* a Knight. So play him first and all of your creatures become Knights and gain the Vitality bonus.

Fear not, Elementals and Externals, you shall gain protection! The standard bearer has the ability to change a creature's border color; that is, for one power stone, you can change any of your creatures into a Mortal and give them Immunity to Fear.

Brom's Dragon (19) also offers a tremendous advantage to any *real* Knights! Most knights have killer OCB's. For one stone, your Captain goes from 10 to 15 against Externals and Mortals (both of which temporarily become Elementals). Your Prince of the Lost will kill just about anything.

Other useful cards:

• For added amusement, add St. Ballantine's Evocation to any "Knight" that loses.
• Channel your Valkyrie Spirit to any Knight (even those that can't accept channeling).
  

Trifecta: A Giant Sucking Sound and a Puff of Smoke

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

A Giant Sucking Sound and a Puff of Smoke

40,000 Useless Warhammers

Annoying Gnats in the Hood

Dispel Magic

Play 40K Useless Warhammers to zero out everyone's Vitality. Then play the Gnats with their 1 pt AOE to blow away your opponent's entire hand, except for his first primary and maybe a command card.

What's the Dispel Magic for? HIS command card. If he plays an AOE on top of your Warhammers, you are thoroughly screwed without a Dispel Magic.

This combo will only go so far. You still need to kill off one or two creatures. The primary can be killed off with a ranged attack. The command card with require a creature with the correct off-color bonus or terrain bonus. Remember, if you're on the attack, you need to destroy your opponent's shield to claim the space. Otherwise, your zero Vitality loses to his zero Vitality and you will have to retreat.

Random Homebrew Cards

I don't know how much longer I'm going to keep the io.com page, but while it's there check out

The Random Homebrew Card Generator

Keep clicking the Refresh button and you'll get a new card every time from all the .sig cards posted to usenet or to the mailing list.

Example: United!: Up Number 21, Event For the rest of this turn, all Creatures are immune to Creatures with of the same Creature Class during primary match-ups. Witness Relocation Program: Spell, Up 18. Play after one of your creatures is beaten in combat. Creature goes to the bottom of your draw deck. Shuffle draw deck. Rickety Aircraft: Creature Magic Item, Up 2 Allows one creature with a stacking Vitality of 6 or less to fly up to three spaces. When using, flip one coin for each space moved: If one head appears, Rickety Aircraft is destroyed. If two heads appear, Rickety Aircraft and creature are both destroyed. If three heads appear, entire Shield is destroyed. This happens before the creature actually enters the space.

I had fogotten about that last one. I believe that I said up to 3 spaces because I wasn't sure if there was a way to fly three spaces or if some other card (possibly homebrew) gave that ability.

Trifecta: Ooooooh, Let Me Pinch Your Cheeks

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Ooooooh, Let Me Pinch Your Cheeks

(from John, hammer@essc.PSU.EDU)

Warhola's Snakes Standard Bearer OR Embryonic Witch

Giant Aunts

Djinn

Giant Aunts immediately rubble stronghold if they win. The Djinn guarantees a push. The standard bearer or the Embryonic Witch lets you win all pushes.

Other useful cards:

• In disputed terrains, replace Giant Aunts with a Lawyer to win the space. The Lawyers only have to survive, not win, so the Lawyer and Djinn are fine by themselves, but the Witch will kill the competition.
  

Trifecta: Wait Your Turn, There's Plenty for Everyone

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Wait Your Turn,
There's Plenty for Everyone

(From Bill Visco.)

Jamchops, the Trader

Pig Dog

Babes

With Jamchops, any bribery card can be used to bribe and bribable creature. The Pig Dog allows you to bribe with Babes and then put the Babes back into storage to be used again. So those three working girls on the Babes card can take care of everyone.

Other useful cards:

• Jambo Slick will help you recover a lost Babes card (in a different combat).
  

Trifecta: What's THAT in the Moat?

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

What's THAT in the Moat?

(This is more of a defense combo.)

Freebooter Stronghold

Either the right or the left one

Pirate Log Platform

7-point AOE

Watcher

Big!

Entering the stronghold triggers a 7-pt AOE, so your foe can have at most three cards (worth 8 or more). You're single creature is a 20, +4 for Rivers and Lakes, +4 for the stronghold, for a Vitaly 28 primary attack (36 if up against an elemental), ready to pound just about anything.

To prevent the Watcher from becoming toast to secondaries, add a creature or two to draw some fire:

• A bunch of 2 point weenies (with stronghold and R&L bonuses) can outnumber and kill your opponent's two or three creatures.
  
• A Grotto Troll and a weenie or two.
  
• A Minotaur. If it loses to a really big card, then the Watcher will see to it that you keep control of the space.
  
• And my personal favorite (drum roll) . . .
  
• A Water Nymph, weighing in as a 14 in the primary matchup, before any off-color bonuses. If she goes up against a bigger creature, by simple arithmetic, the Watcher creamed its opponent.

Your opponent will need channeling or off-color bonuses to get past you.

Trifecta: Pre-Arrr-Ranged

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Pre-Arrr-Ranged

(alright, so this one is kind of obvious.)

Soooooooul Mirror

Play as Commmand Card; all your primary attackers are same Creature Class as your first

any Pirate

(Captain Red Nose is great)

Scurvy Dog

3 pt ranged attack, only usable if primary is Pirate

Admittedly, a long way to go for a 3-pt. ranged attack. But it does expand Scurvy Dog's usefulness. If you use Captain Red Nose as your first attacker, then all of your primaries will get a +4 class bonus to boot! Usually, the Captain's great girth -- he takes up half a shield! -- limits the number of Pirates that can great his bonus. This way, every 2-point creature you have can claim the bonus!

Trifecta: Avast! Take That and That!

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Avast! Take that and that!

(alright, so this one is kind of obvious.)

Master Gunner

5 pt ranged attack.

Cabin Boy

Can be sent from Combat Hand to Creature Pen in place of bribed Pirate

The Great Balderoon

Play when using Pirate ranged attack; attack counts as AOE as well as normal; costs 1 stone

What? He tried to bribe your ranged attack? Well, send the Cabin Boy back instead and then serve up the Great Balderoon to make that five point attack and AOE attack.

Trifecta: Rising from the Ashes

Guardians Trifectas

Trifectas are interesting -- and sometimes deadly -- three-card combos for Guardians . . . if you can pull them off.

And watch out that you're not on the receiving end of one of them!

---

Rising from the Ashes

Summon Dimensional Fire Well

Play during D&O rubble one of your Strongholds, destroy anything
on it, make your Power Stones equal 5

Cuthbert the Resurrector

Play during D&O pick a Creature from discard pile as one of your
draws; must show Creature to opponent

Castellan Keir

If on your Rubble space during TS, may discard Keir to flip
Rubble back to Stronghold

Low on Power Stones? Rubble a stronghold to bring your total stones to 5. Put Castellan Keir on it and discard him to bring your stronghold back to life. Then play Cuthbert and bring Keir back! You're ready to try it again.

Probabilities when Drawing

I was rereading one of Jackalware's blog entries about probabilities in Guardians, and I decided I was going to do the math on this one for myself. Yes, I've been away from teaching for less than one week, and already I'm doing recreational mathematics.

Anyway, my numbers were way off. I thought I was doing it right, but I must've been entering something incorrectly. I finally gave up and used the formula that Excel has just for this sort of thing, and which Jackalware originally used as well.

Here's what the results look like:

How do you read this?

The "60" in the upper left is the number of cards in the deck.

The rest of the numbers in column A represent how many of card "X" you have in the deck (terrain, shields, Vampires, Knights, etc.).

The rest of the numbers in row 1 represent how many you may get in your initial 12 card draw.

The formula is shown. Note the dollar signs ($). They are important for cutting and pasting in Excel. Don't forget them. Notice that $A$1 has two of them. Doubly important.

You can expand the list by adding more rows and columns and copying & pasting the formula into more cells. It you paste into an invalid cell (e.g., drawing 3 copies of a card when there are only 2 in the deck), you will get an error.

The formula has a 12 in it. That stands for the 12-card draw.
You can adjust this for other card games (do you play other card games?) just by changing that number.

How NOT TO read this

Let's say you have 8 Shields and 8 Terrain in a deck of 60 cards.
There is a 33.66% chance of getting 2 Shields in the initial draw.
There is a 33.66% chance of getting 2 Terrain in the initial draw.
There is NOT a 67.32% chance of getting 2 Shields and 2 Terrain!
Nor if there a (33.66*33.66)% chance. (In other words, don't add or multiply).

It's a little more complicated than that.
The chart just gives you a basic idea, such as if you put 8 in your deck, you are most likely to get 1 or 2. If you put 10 in your deck, you are likely to get 2 or 3.

If you 5 each of 8 creatures, you will most likely get 1 of any specific one, but you could easily get 2 of some and none of the others.

Creature Class Critique #25: Undead, Part 2

Christopher's Creature Class Critique #25: Undead, Part II

There are so many Undead that I've had to break it up into the Limited and Dagger Isle Undead and the Drifter's and Necropolis Park Undead. This worked well because the first two sets are so much easier to find. Now let's mix in the "play 'em if you got 'em" cards.

This critique covers Drifters Nexus and Necropolis Park, if you can find them. Obviously, from its name, you can guess that NP was full of Undead -- and you'd be right. There was only one Undead in Drifters Nexus: "Buzz", Vampire Mosquito. He's also a Bug, but whether or not he qualifies as a "Vampire" is an unanswered question (but he sure acts like one and my "house" rule is that he is). DN also has Carrag the Black, a Wizard that kicks serious butt in an Undead deck, particularly near the end.

Common Threads

Bribery: Four by Gold, three by Babes (plus Carrag). None by Beer. I guess the Undead have lost their tastebuds. Nubian Slave Girls can be sacrified for discarded Gold.

Channeling: Five creatures accept channeling, but the largest of these is only Vitality 6. None of them channel. The Priest of Sethos prevents stones from being spent for channeling (though it doesn't prevent channeling outright).

Flying: Just the Mosquito. Fan Bearer sends fliers back to the Creature Pen. Combine her with Ice Storms for maximum hilarity.

Size: No Large, 17 Medium, and two Small (including a Saurian, believe it or not).

Off-Color bonus: Ones and zeroes mostly, except for the Priestess of Isis, who is Vitality 12 with OCB 3.

Ranged attacks: Slim Jab is a 1-pointer that's only usable against externals, but when played, your opponent discards a double-bordered card. Great when your opponent plays Fairies. Or Undead. (Slim Jab makes a great "sidebar" card.)

Terrain bonuses: None. Not counting the Necropolis Park stronghold, which "saves" killed Undead. It's basically a "permanent" Howl of the Dead spell.

Commands: Nine! Choose wisely. You can prevent Spells, stop channeling with Power Stones, change your Creature Class, change your opponent's Mortal's creature class ("There goes your Pirate bonus, Nick."), discard all double-bordered cards, empty text boxes, swap Spells and steal your opponent's command Spell or Item. I think I got them all.

Immunity: None. Mummy and Plague Walker have fear-based attacks, but neither explicitly states that they are immune to them, too (like, e.g., Sun Spirits and Fire Walkers).

Power Stones: Buzz can cost you a Stone and several of the command abilities cost a Stone to use.

Other: Just about every Undead creature has a special ability of some sort. This is what makes up for the lack of immunity, terrain bonuses, ranged attacks, etc. It also makes it more confusing to put a dedicated deck together (other than "pile on the Undead and go out and kick butt!" -- not that there's anything wrong with that.)

I hope I covered everything.

A Quick Rundown of Cards

As stated in Part 1: Not gonna happen.

Other "Theme" Cards

Carrag the Black: He's Vitality 5, but his text box gives him a +1 Vitality boost for every Undead in the discard pile. You can get him up in the 10-15 range pretty quickly, without too much harm to your position in the game. Particularly when using Dead Cats (which if they get killed, your surviving creatures get a Vitality bonus.)

You Can't See Me, I'm a Vampire: When played on an Undead creature in primaries, both cards become Unchallenged Cards. This can be used to save your Undead creature or by your opponent to save his. Neutral card, but you already know that you have Undead, he probably doesn't, so it can work in your favor more often.

Chant of the Osirans: Played after Up-Cards are revealed, if opponent's Up-card is an Undead, it goes to the discard pile, along with the next 4 cards in his draw deck. Another Up-Card is then drawn. This is something to be careful of, but, again, the card is useless against all but Undead decks. Not to mention the fact that Undead in your discard pile only helps Carrag.

Other Cards

See Part I (Critique #24) for more. They all apply here, too.

Ice Storm: mentioned above -- combine it with Fan Bearer to destroy little flyers and send big ones home.

Jambo Slick, Smuggler: This Wanderer from DN will get back your Bribery cards (all of them, not just Gold). Works well with Nubian Slave Girls.

Cuthbert the Resurrector: Undead have a tendency to stay around, thanks to things like Howl of the Dead, the NP Stronghold, and even Holy Grail. But should they actually go to the discard pile (perhaps by way of Chant of the Osirans), this will pull one back.

Bruno Smashmouth, Union Boss: This Misc. Human from DN has been mentioned by me before. After you play Bruno, if any of your creatures's classes match your opponent's class, your opponent's primary attacker goes to the Creature Pen. So? So combine this with Chief Lector Priest of Sethos and turn all of your Undead into whatever your opponent is playing. All that will be left are his command card and his first primary (played opposite Bruno). Beating Bruno doesn't help him, your opponent has to bribe or destroy Bruno or he'll likely lose his shield.

St. Ballantine's Evocation: A variant of Bruno, above, you can hold onto Ballantine in case of emergency and turn any of your Undead into a Knight and then blow up your opponent's biggest creature. No Warwick's Conversion needed.

Strategies

You're on your own here. There are just too many possibilities. It depends on the Undead and Guardian you pick. You can siphon off stones with your Vampires and Shadrunes. You can chop down their flyers. You can give bonus channeling above the usual limits. Use Arms of the Earth if your opponent favors big creatures and shields with few creatures. Ice Storms & Fan Bearers, Chief Lector Bruno. Endless possibilities.

Secondary Classes

Undead can stand on their own well and don't need a secondary class. That's true enough without the cards from Drifters Nexus and Necropolis Park, which only add to the kickass nature of the Undead.

Weakness

Sun Spirits: They kick Undead butt from here to the MidRealms. Not much you can do about it. You don't want to carry about 10-point Captains with you to smack them down. Best you can do is send them away using the Bruno combo or go for mutual destruction. Only two Undead (Eternal Witch Lord and Black Unicorn) can survive if you channel enough to them.

Final Comments

I can't make too many comments, but Undead decks are brutal and Necropolis Park only adds to their lethality.


C. J. Burke
Keeper of the Flame

Rouge Scepter: Hand Magic Item, Up 15
Play during primary match-ups. Your primary match-up Creature gets +10 versus Undead. It Undead opponent loses, it is destroyed.

(Yes, I deliberately spelled it "Rouge" instead of "Rogue".)

Creature Class Critique #24: Undead, Part 1

Christopher's Creature Class Critique #24: Undead, Part One

Okay, I'll state this right off the bat -- this is in no way the definitive discussion of Undead. There are just too many of them for that. But I'll do what I can to slice through this pile of stinkin' bones.

There are about 50 cards that deal in some way with Undead and nearly half of them come from Necropolis

Park. If you don't have any NP and have no access to them, keep reading. I'll do this in two parts, the first being restricted to Dagger Isle and earlier. That is, this critique will be restricted to 19 Undead creatures, one supporting and three anti-Undead creatures, and 1 Spell.

Common Threads

Bribery: Easy one. Out of 19 creatures, NONE are bribable. The Necromancer, however, a mortal Wizard is bribable by Babes.

Channeling: Six creatures accept channeling. Three creatures can channel. Two do both. Bone Shambler and Wraith receive double the usual amount. The Necromancer also channels -- better than any of the Undead do, but only to Undead.

Flying: None of them. Not even a bat (he came later). So bring on the Ice Storms.

Size: A few Large and one Small, but the rest are all Medium. That might be a problem about a bunch of Varmit Archers but even that's not much to worry about.

Off-Color bonus: Ten have a small off-color bonus, including the Bone Shambler, which has a variant card that has no OCB. (That was a typo when they were printed.) Be careful which one you use.

Ranged attacks: Just one, Grim Skull, but he's got a bonus -- he's the only ranged attack that can receive channeling to the ranged attack!

Terrain bonuses: None.

Command Cards: Three. Arms of the Earth, which allows you to pull a creature from your opponent's hand, Wailing Spectre, which has a 4-pt fear AOE, and Embryonic Witch, which wins pushes. Leaves room for Rik' Sook, so you can use your Necromancer.

Immunity: None. Shadow of Ashes has a fire-based attack, but isn't immune to fire, nor is Wailing Spectre immune to fear.

Power Stones: Skeletal Minion returns to Storage for a stone, if it loses. Shadrune can cost your opponent a stone. So can Vampire and Vampire Lord.

Other: Just about every Undead creature has a special ability of some sort. This is what makes up for their lack of immunity, terrain bonuses, ranged attacks, etc. It also makes it more confusing to put a dedicated deck together (other than "pile on the Undead and go out and kick butt!" -- not that there's anything wrong with that.)

I hope I covered everything.

A Quick Rundown of Cards

Not gonna happen. Just too many of them.

Other "Theme" Cards

Ice Spirit: Immune to Undead. Watch out for it, or you'll be channeling just to keep your creatures alive. (Ice Spirit hits Undead as a 7.) Note that Ice Spirits are not immune to secondary attacks or Grim Skull's ranged attacks.

White Unicorns: Destroy Demons, Devils and Undead. But they're rare, so you don't have to worry as much as you do with Ice Spirits.

Vampire Hunters: A strange creature. A Vitality 8 Mortal with an OCB of 1 against Elementals and +10 vs Undead, but they have to worry about the Undead's OCB against them. However, since Undead have low or no OCB, that +10 bonus can be devastating or at least cost you a stone.

Howl of the Dead: Reclaim your Undead when you lose them in combat. Good card to have.

Other Cards

Warwick's Conversion: A natural for theme deck. Note that these are good for the Necromancer, but not for the Vampire Lord. Vampire isn't a real class. Perhaps it could be a "subclass", if there were such a thing. (And that begs the question, which I'll ask again next time, is Buzz, the Vampire Mosquito, the Undead/Bug, is he, in fact, a Vampire? He sure acts like one!)

Rik' Sook: You have a guy that channels only to Undead, but the Undead don't receive channeling in great numbers. This will even that out. And without large numbers of command card creatures in your deck, there's plenty of room.

Ice Storms: You're not flying, and flying creatures are popular even if they aren't in flying shields. Go for it.

Strategies

You're on your own here. There are just too many possibilities. It depends on the Undead and Guardian you pick. You can siphon off stones with your Vampires and Shadrunes. You can chop down their flyers. You can give bonus channeling above the usual limits. Use Arms of the Earth if your opponent favors big creatures and shields with few creatures.

Secondary Classes

Undead can stand on their own well and don't need a secondary class. That's true enough without the cards from Drifters Nexus and Necropolis Park, which only add to the kickass nature of the Undead.

Individual cards are helpful, but not an entire secondary class.

Weakness

Sun Spirits: They kick Undead butt from here to the MidRealms. Not much you can do about it. You don't want to carry about 10-point Captains with you to smack them down.

Final Comments

I can't make too many comments. The first Undead deck I went up against was made after we got our hands on a box of Necropolis Park, and that set was heavily represented. Has anyone else put together an Undead deck without benefit of Drifters Nexus or Necropolis Park? They still look formidable.


C. J. Burke

Banshee: External, Vitality 6, OCB 0, Medium, Undead, CMP 0, red bar.
At the end of the next match-up, if both creatures remain in play, the losing creature is destroyed.

Creature Class Critique # 23: Wizards

More power in their fingertips than in a Giant's biceps. You know them by names such as Argammond, Warwick and Carrag the Black. These are Wizards of the MidRealms. They can make or break a game, and decks can be built around them. But will they work together? Possibly.

There are nine types of Wizards found wandering the disputed lands, and unlike nearly all other classes, they are divided among the Mortal and External classes. (The O-Men are the only other single class creatures to be like this.) Quickly, they are Seer, Visionary, Cleric, Sorcerer, Grand Avatar and Rik' Sook from Limited and Voodoo Wizard and Necromancer from Dagger Island and Carrag the Black from Drifters Nexus.

There are no Wizards in Necropolis Park (though Rik' Sook looks like he belongs there).

Common Threads

Bribery: Most of the Wizards are in it for the money, and Gold will count for a lot with them. But things change over time, it seems, because after the Revised edition came out, all the expansion Wizards have turned their eyes toward the ladies and will go for the Babes.

Channeling: All but one can receive channeling. (Mini-quiz: which one?) Find another creature class (with many members) that can boast that! On top of that, two of them can channel (though one channels only to Undead.)

Commands: Bad news - five of these guys are command cards, so you can't use them all at the same time. But if you're out for power and you're using their channel receiving abilities, then you could look at this as flexibility.

Size: All the Wizards are human or humanoid. That is, Medium-sized. Too bad there isn't a Tookle for Mediums, huh? Nah, that would be silly.

Other "Theme" Cards

Elandar, Mighty Wizard: He's not a Wizard, he's a Wanderer and he blanks out texts boxes. This actually only "harms" Carrag the Black and Clerics as the rest don't come into play in primary attacks. It actually *helps* the Grand Avatar by removing a restriction!

Wizards Tower: A Stronghold Upgrade that aids any channeler (not just Wizards) by bumping CMP up by 1. And you have 2 channelers in this
group.

Sacrificial Altar: Yes, it's a theme card. Clerics use Altars and they're Wizards. Unlike Dungeons & Dragons, there is no distinction between Clergy and Magic Users. Spells are spells, you know. And besides, you'll need the stones if you're planning to channel.

Strategies

Channel! Fight and channel! Then channel some more! The abilities demand it.

Some of these guys are better than the others, particularly in this type of deck. The Visionary is helpful to try to avoid your opponent's OCBs, but the Seer isn't going to give you any useful information. Voodoo Wizard gives you a great power boost, but Rik' Sook's ability is only needed for one other Wizard (he gets better with a secondary class). And the Sorcerer's AOE is nice, but it's expensive -- unless your playing against Sikura, you're better off with Vitale's Dark Cloud. (Granted, Sorceror can be re-used, but your opponent will be on to you after the first attack.)

Secondary Classes

Usually Wizards are support for other cards in your deck -- the high OCB creatures, creatures with immunity to or bonuses against certain sizes, lots of channeling non-receivers, etc.

But if you want to put multiple Wizards together as a main class, one (obvious) secondary pops to mind: Undead. The Necromancer channels to some (not all) of them, Rik' Sook allows the Necromancer to channel to more of them. Carrag the Black gets amazing bonuses for the "dead" Undead creatures. Grand Avatars can channel to some or all of them. And you can still use the Voodoo Wizards command for the secondaries.

(Visionary and Seer are less important but they're still channel receivers.)

It might have been nice if there were Wizards for Angels or Demons & Devils or Knights or what have you, but there aren't. (Not even my made-up Alchemist from a previous Elements post.)

Otherwise, the only other uses is to make the Wizards the secondary class. Take a class with a good OCB, then use the Visionary to insure that the best bonuses go up against the right type of creature. If playing Knights, you might consider Seers to balance your Lancers (ooh, but look out for those Titans!). And then use Rik' Sook to channel to your non-channelers for a little surprise.

Quiz answer: Necromancers cannot accept channeling.

Summary: Wizards would better supporting others, but there's no reason why the Wizards can't work for themselves with just a little support from others instead. Just have plenty of stones and channelers for pumping these guys up. You'll need them.

C. J. Burke
Keeper of the Flame

Wizards' Guild: Stronghold Upgrade 24
All Wizards defending on this Stronghold space can receive double their usual limit for channeling.

Now this is a cool Barnyard Animals card

If you like homebrew cards, such as my .sig cards or the Seven Seas expansion, check out the Champion's Odyssey Card, Preview #10: Abracadabra!

I don't know if it would tip the balance for a Barnyard Animals deck, but, like Chicken Soup, it couldn't hurt.

Some corrections posted

So I'm posting those Critiques in the order that they were on my website when what do I get to? A list of corrections!

Sigh.

Anyway, I've fixed those posts instead of making a separate list of corrections. It isn't like anyone noticed anyway. (Or if they had, no one said anything to me.)

Creature Class Critique #22: Dragons

"Here there be dragons . . ." or something like that. "Drakes, freshness you can taste."

I'm falling behind, so I'm throwing this one up here unedited. I hope to have time to fix it later. Enjoy.

There, deep in the heart of the mountain, at the bottom of a cavernous maze, lay the end of the quest and lair of the dragon. Do you have the wherewithal to enter?

Why not? In Guardians, dragons would hardly be found in the bottom of mountains. Most of them take to the air and of the two that don't, one prefers the water.

There are six Dragons (aka Drakes) in Guardians and, for the most part, they're BIG. Like the creatures of myth, they're fond of the fair maidens, but they'll settle for the tramps that are featured on the Babes card. And big as they are, you can channel to most of them, which makes half of them Guardian killers.

Common Threads: Five are Large and the same five are bribable by Babes. Four of them them fly (including the Medium one). Four of the large ones can receive channeling and one of those can channel a whole one point (oh, boy, wow!). Three of them have AOEs -- hey, what's a dragon without dragon breath? Several of them seem to like devouring low vitality creatures. (Hmmm, where's that Tookle fairy deck?)

None has a ranged attack.

Worst common thread -- all but one is Rare and the other is Uncommon. That will make a big problem collecting these into a cohesive deck.

From Smallest to Biggest:

Bantam Drake - Vitality 8, Medium flyer, Gold bribable. +7 Vitality vs flying creatures (although the picture looks more like it should have a bonus against non-flyers, but it guess it likes to strike really high up.) The Bantam Drake is the one guy that really won't help against a Fairy deck.

Hal, a Toasis Dragon - Vitality 9, OCB 1, Large flyer, Babe and Beer bribable, channel receiver. Command: if your primary attackers lose by less than 5, both creatures are destroyed. That'll help against those little guy decks. Hal is also one of the worst puns in the game. (I really have to put together a concordance of jokes in this game....) Oddly enough, despite the joke, Hal doesn't have an AOE breath weapon, but his ability is better than that.

Vesuvious Rex - Vitality 13, Large flyer, Babes bribable, channel receiver. Rex is immune to secondary attackers with Base Vitality 5 or less. So they can forget about that bonus for those Goldthwaite Jumpers and Buzzards (but watch out for those Devil Dogs!).

Lake Serpent - Vitality 17, Large, Babes bribable, channel receiver, +3 Vitality in Rivers and Lakes. The Serpent is the only Dragon with a terrain bonus, and it gets a fire AOE, too.

Land Drake - Vitality 18, OCB 5, Large, Babes bribable, 3 point fire AOE. It doesn't receive channeling but it gets an OCB. For some reason, when I hear the name, I keep thinking of Chevy Chase in that sketch, "Land Shark".

Dragon Wing Lord - Vitality 19, Large flyer, Babes and Beer bribable, channel receiver, CMP 1. Five point AOE fire breath. The baddest unmodified AOE in the game. I wouldn't waste it for the CMP 1, personally.

And a bonus:

Kikijub - Vitality 14, OCB 2, Large. +9 Vitality in Mountains. Kikijub isn't a Dragon -- it isn't anything. But it looks like it could be. Maybe. Sort of. What the hey -- it's big and nasty.

What to Do With Them?

First off, don't put a Dragon Wing Lord and a Vesuvious Rex in the same shield (along with a Rye Beaner or Scamp Jones). That sort of defeats the purpose Rex's purpose, doesn't it?

You can't make them the primary focus of your deck. Why? Because they're too big! How do you stack seventeens and nineteens?? Rookie mistake. You need some low number creatures to balance it out. Bugs, Varmits, Gnomes, Barnyard Animals, maybe even Chaks, but something.

(The three Chaks complement some Dragon abilities: Greenback Chaks destroy Small creatures -- three Dragons have AOEs that will burn away low vitality creatures, so there's an overlap there. Fatback Chaks is immune to secondary attackers (however, you can't make any either!), V. Rex is immune if they're Vitality less than 5. And the Slackback Chak must be beaten by 3 or more or its a push, but with Hal, he must be beaten by more than 5 or both are destroyed!)

However, how small depends upon which creature you're using. If you're using Hal, you don't want your supporting players to be so small that Hal's ability won't ever kick in. And you'd probably want them to be big enough to win occassionally to avoid destruction.

(Remember, destroyed creatures can't be revived on the Altar of Takuli.) Here's where sneaky bonuses come in handy -- like Bulbous Clamjacks in Swamps or Sales Weasels. And Schneebles and Snoots can be especially effective.

Your best bet will be to get one Dragon into every Shield that you send out, so your opponent will have something to fear, and so that you'll have room in the shield for some backups!


Secondary Classes

Frankly, the Dragons *are* the secondary class. You may want to build around them, but they are too big to have too many in one deck. You need some help.

Flyers are good. Things with extra AOEs are always helpful. After all, how many can your opponent bribe or dispel or burn a stone to prevent (Hescox 25 standard bearer)?

And don't forget Rye Beaner and Scamp Jones! You need the extra room.

Shields

If you want a theme going, there are two Dragon standard bearers, but neither are particularly helpful for this deck. One is a penalty for ranged attacks on both sides and the other changes border color. You don't have any ranged attacks among the Dragons, so that might be okay (but there are better defensive standard bearers, IMHO) and changing border color won't do much for you either, except perhaps to protect you from those nasty Sun Spirits and their ilk.

DO NOT use Shield/Terrain. (Duh!)


Anything Else?

Yes, Ugly Wart Fiends and Shadow Panty Raids. You don't want to lose 19 points of a 30 point Shield to a silly bribery card. Sure, you're creature will come back, but you'll likely lose a Shield in the process!


Cards to Watch Out For

Babes cards. And Super Models. And there isn't much worse than having your 5 point AOE taken out of the round by a stupid Major Party Animal (though a Dispel will take care of him).

Old Nick. It's the only thing bigger than your guys. There are a few other bigger things, but they don't receive channeling (and they're Mortal, so you may have a bonus to beat them).

And all the usual stuff that any deck has to watch out for.


Which Guardian to Use?

Rak Nam will give you the raw power that the Dragons need, so he's an obvious first choice. After that, it depends upon personal preference, planned strategy and your choice of supporting cards.


Summary: I don't know how cohesive a Dragon deck would be, but Dragons are great disruptive cards when played at the right time. Sprinkled liberally into another deck, they can swing a game around. They're great for repeatedly pounding low-vitality creature decks, but have to be careful not to get beaten by those nasty secondary attackers.


C. J. Burke
Keeper of the Flame

Daffy Drake: External, Vitality 11, OCB 0 Large Flying Dragon, Babes, CMP 0, green bar.
5 point ranged attack.

Creature Class Critique #21: Elements

"Elementary, my dear Watson . . ."

Tired of Tookle and thinking Small. Then think Big, think Large, or at least think Medium. Think Elements. Not Elementals, mind you. Just "Elements".

There are 17 Elements in the game: 10 from Limited, 1 from Dagger Isle, and 6 from Drifters Nexus. (Necropolis Park was full of Saurians and Traithes.) An astounding 14 of them are Large, and the other 3 are Medium. There are no Small Elements. Hey, would you expect something that's akin to controlling the forces of nature to be Small? (Except, of course, that they aren't "Forces"; those were done in Critter Critique #10!)

Five of these guys can fly. Six are bribable by Beer (which, after all, is one of the most important Elements in the game). Four are channelable (including one that's got unlimited channel receiving ability) and one with CMP 2. Four have terrain bonuses and six can change the terrain. (The Overlords are Elements, don't you know.)
One has a ranged attack. Eight are command cards (seven of which can be useful).

Let's kill the suspense and bring out our Elements:

Air, Earth, Fire and ... Whoops, forgot one:
- Earth Elemental, V18 OCB 9 Large, +2 in the Dry Heaps.
- Fire Elemental, V14 Medium Flying, +2 in the Woods and 4-pt fire AOE.
- Greater Air Elemental, V16 Large Flying, +6 vs flying creatures.

Air+Water, Water+Earth, Water+Earth (again), Earth+Fire:
- Vapor Elemental, V11 Large Flying Channel receiving. When played in a match-up, opponent must discard any Items in Combat hand.
- Mud Elemental, V8 OCB 2 Medium, +4 in Swamps.
- Ice Elemental, V15 OCB 6 Medium, +4 in Mountains.
- Magma Elemental, V9 Large, 4 point ranged-attack.

(No Fire+Air. That would be Smoke, but we have a Smoke Spirit already.)

Light, Dark and Energy:
- Light Elemental, V13 OCB 2 Large Flying Channel Receiving, Destroys Darkness Elemental.
- Darkness Elemental, V13 OCB 3 Large, Command: Opponent must reveal his Combat Hand. You may choose to retreat before melee, but discard the Darkness Elemental to do so.
- Greater Energy Elemental, V12 Large Flying Unlimited Channel Receiving! CMP 2.

Overlords: All are Large Beer drinkers. Command cards, for the duration of combat, the disputed land space being fought upon is considered to be ...
Rey, Overlord of Trees, V4 OCB 2 ... to be Woods. No ranged attacks.
Gnorg, Overlord of Swamps, V6 OCB 1 ... to be Swamps
Ix, Overlord of the Waters, V5 OCB 1 ... to be Rivers and Lakes.
Uras, Overlord of Mountains, V2 OCB 2 Channel Receiver, ... to be Mountains.
Slor, Overlord of the Wastes, V5 OCB 2 ... to be Dry Heaps
Baezhu, Overlord of Twisted Ways, V2 OCB 2 ... to be Spires

Miscellaneous:
Vensuni Inferno Swarm, V6(stacks 14) OCB 4, Command: 11-pt AOE fire attack, discard entire combat hand

Personal Perferences

Vensuni Inferno Swarm is a great card to root out and destroy a bunch of weenie creatures as long as they aren't immune to fire or have a Iron Crag Baggler handy (or Hescox 25 Egyptian motif standard bearer).

The Greater Energy Elemental can kill Guardians single-handedly (but I only have one and I haven't actually used it.)

The Light Elemental is a big flying channel receiver. It's only flaw is the useless "Destroys Darkness Elemental", which is nice, except that there is little reason for someone to play a Darkness Elemental and more reason for someone to play a Golden Fleecer. (Ouch.)

The Overlords have their uses. People love 'em or hate em. Gnorgg is a little expensive for a Swamp deck, but he's a nice surprise if you're packing Clamjacks (particularly Odious ones). Uras teams up nicely with Festus (and when beaten in combat, your opponent gets to say, "Ha! I beat 'Ur-as'!")

Vapor Elementals are just fun and cool. Why? I don't know, I just like them. Three of them and Scamp Jones (get him to fly if you can!) make One Nice Shield.

Earth Elemental pounds nearly every Undead in the game.

I like them all, in fact. EXCEPT! Except for the Darkness Elemental, which has a really silly command ability. First of all, why spend 13 points of your hand just to see what's in your opponent's hand? That leaves you with only 17 points. Press Leak give you the same ability except that it lasts for the entire round! The only difference is that you can retreat under cover of Darkness ... but you have to destroy the Darkness Elemental. D'oh! Of course, I'm going to retreat. I just wasted 13 points on a command card!

There's only one reason to use this card, and that's the rare Drifters Nexus Card, Standard of the Elements. This Magic Item becomes a ranged attack, the strength of which is equal to the Vitality of your Element (not Elemental!) command card. That means the card is worth 2, 4, 5, 6 or 13 points. Even in this case, a Thunder Hawk is a better choice.


Other Cards

Other than Standard of the Elements, the only card to use is Energy Well, which channels 3 points to all Elementals. That includes five of your cards. After that, you need cards to capitalize on your Overlords abilities or some other fliers or cards that support whatever strategy you see here.

Fiends won't help you. All your Beer bribables are command cards.


Secondary Classes

Thematically, the best fits are Forces and Spirits because it's sometimes difficult to see why something fits into one group or another. For instance, there's no Water Elemental, but there's a Water Spout (force). There's no Smoke Elemental, but there's a Smoke Spirit. There's both an Ice Spirit and Ice Elemental (with totally different vitalities and abilities).

Realistically, those would be poor choices anyway. Although some forces and spirits might complement particular cards, you need something to protect you from Mortal (particularly Knight, Pirates and Giants, with their big off color bonuses).

Likewise, Elemental Lord looks good, but isn't. Besides being the same color, these guys are just too big! You need some smaller guys to fill out the Shields.

Frankly, I'm at a loss. Undead are good, but they're good by themselves. Fairies would round things out and the Woods help your Fire Elemental, but they're good by themselves, too. Pixies, Titans (nah, too big), Fungus and Mold? Experiment.


Cards to Watch Out For

Great Ba'te - Immune to secondary attacks from Elementals.
Nob, Rapacious Gob - Kills Elementals as secondary attacker.
Orella of the Mist - Has a 1 in 3 chance of destroying Elementals.
River Giant - Immune to Elementals in Rivers and Lakes.


Which Guardian to Use?

Rak Nam - Leader of the Mighty. Simple and straigtforward. Nine points of channeling makes your Vapor Elementals 20 for one stone. Add in a Gift of Isis, add it's double at 22 for one stone. And you need raw power to pump up that Greater Energy Elemental.

Do NOT use Harkin with Greater Energy Elemental!

Gaar isn't much good either. These are Big Boys. Five points for two stones is nothing. Get some Power Lunches or add Rik' Sook instead.

Summary: Raw power and control of the very terrain you're playing on. But having never tried a deck of this type I can't say that it will work. I can only say that I'd like to make a deck work. However, in general, Elements individually seem to help other decks better than working as a cohesive deck on their own. There are no special abilities that link all the cards together, nor do their special abilities focus in any particular direction. But that also means that they will usually be some condition where some of the cards can prosper against any opponent.


C. J. Burke
Keeper of the Flame


ObSigcard: I owe you one. That's because I have sooooooo many ideas from typing this one up that I might do an entire list of them. All of the Elements are swirling around me, force to be reckoned with, attacking my Spirit. My head is spinning -- 360 degrees around.