Luring New Players to Guardians

(undated, original webpage last updated April '98)

I'm trying to make a list of cards that you have to have in a game when you and your opponent are primarily trying to lure other people into the game (to increase your pool of opponents, naturally).

Now the artwork will grab them, but first they have to be close enough to see it. So you have to lure them over with your babble and chatter. This means that the decks should be spiked with cards with either cool names, unusual names, or something that will just naturally attract attention.

I tried to stick to the main set so far, but anything's fair game.

1. "I give your Devil Dog a keg of beer to make him go away!"

First thing, you need Beer and Babe cards, and you both need to stack creatures bribeable by both of these. Gold doesn't attract as much attention, in my opinion.

2. Super Models

"My Supermodel steps in and lures your Knight to his death."
("Knight" sounds better than "Captain".)

3. Gunner/Master Gunner or any Pirate

I had to add this. A couple of friends of mine weren't really interested until I mentioned "pirates". Suddenly, I had their attention. For this reason, use the word "pirate" when attacking instead of the actual card name. And do the voice, too:

"Avast ye! Me pirate fires broadside at your Earth Elemental for 4 points of damage."

4. Giant Penguin

In your best British falsetto: "What's on top of the telly? Why, it looks like a penguin."

5. Floyd, the Flying Pig

Just a silly name. Prompt your opponent to say something like, "When pigs fly!" right before you play him.

6. Cow.

Just the very idea of a Methane attack and gassing the opposition is silly in itself. Unfortunately, the card is otherwise weak.

7. Babe Hound and Pig Dog

The names are funny. And if your playing with lots of Babes and Babes-bribable creatures, they come in handy.

8. Vampire

"My Vampire bites and sucks off two power stones."

If you play it up big enough, you'll get someone to glance at the card long enough to enjoy the artwork. If they're already standing close enough to see the card (and they're male) they'll start snickering at the words "sucks off".

9. Dinosaurs

Doesn't matter the name or that they're really "Saurians". Just roar and call them big dinosaurs and little dinosaurs.

10. Shadow Panty Raid

"I bring out the Babes."
"Well, I'm staging a panty raid and taking those babes away from you."

Ditto for the Shadow Beer Heist, if you're playing with a lot of Beer although you might call it a "Beer Run" or whatever expression you use.

Okay, that's my list, so far. What would you add (or subtract)?